Men fall in love with their eyes. Women fall in love with their ears.
The three words every woman really longs to hear: I’ll clean up.
Marriage is very difficult. It’s like a 5,000–piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky.
The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook.
It’s true hard work never killed anybody, but I figure, why take the chance?
If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.